Refusing To Take Sides

If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

“Hey, I feel like I haven’t seen Autumn lately,” Gianna’s mom said at the dinner table one night.

Looking down at her plate, Gianna glumly shrugged her shoulders. “We’re not really getting along right now,” she admitted.

As her mom gave her a sympathetic smile and rubbed her shoulder, Gianna tried to smile but couldn’t manage it.

The truth was, she felt like she’d been abandoned. She and Autumn had a crush on the same boy, but because he was interested in Gianna, their other friends had taken Autumn’s side against her. Even though Gianna hadn’t done anything wrong, she suddenly found herself struggling in her friendships, as her core group of friends turned their backs and began to avoid her.

When they saw her at school or at the mall, they ignored her and pretended she no longer existed. Events weren’t as fun to attend any longer, either, because Gianna had so few friends to spend time with while there. Gianna was miserable.

A few weeks later, Autumn apologized for letting her hurt feelings come between them, and Gianna forgave her. They became even better friends than they had been in the past. Though Gianna missed her other friends, she was glad she at least had Autumn to lean on.

It can be hard not to take up an offense for someone else. When someone we care about feels hurt, we often feel angry or upset on their behalf. As Christians, we are to be people of peace. It’s important to note that we are asked to do so “if it is possible.” Sometimes conflict is unavoidable, and there are times when people just aren’t interested in making peace with us. There’s an appropriate time to respectfully disagree with others, especially if we are asked to do or say something that doesn’t honor God. When it comes to friendship, living at peace means being willing to admit when we’re wrong, apologize, and forgive one another—that’s what “as far as it depends on you” means. When two of our friends squabble, we need to be very careful not to jump to conclusions or choose sides. Instead, we should consider how we can help foster peace and healing among friends.

Things to Think About

• Have you ever had a disagreement with some of your friends? In that situation, were you helping to bring peace to the situation or were you adding more drama?
• How can you be a person of peace in the midst of friendship conflicts?

DAILY ACT OF FRIENDSHIP

The next time friends have a dispute, refuse to take sides.