It’s God’s Kindness

It’s God’s Kindness

Don’t you see how wonderfully kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Does this mean nothing to you? Can’t you see that his kindness is intended to turn you from your sin?

Romans 2:4

ONE TIME AFTER A CHURCH SERVICE a lady bounced up to me and said, “Hey!”

I said, “Hey!”

“My name’s Sandy,” she said very quickly, “but not for long it isn’t. I’m changing it! It’s been a bad year for Sandys—Hurricane Sandy, Sandy Hook Elementary.”

I nodded, a bit confused.

“So, hey!” Sandy continued. “I just wanted to thank you for keeping it positive.”

I asked what she meant.

Sandy (or whatever her new name would be) said, “I went to church a few times growing up, and I’ve gone a couple of times as an adult, and I hate it. Hate it! You always feel like you’re being judged. People look down on you. It’s all negative. It’s all about their rules. Don’t do this. Don’t do that. They tell me I have to dress appropriately. I’ve always hated church, but I’ve always wanted to know Jesus. So when I heard about this church, I decided I would check it out one time, and it was great! Thanks for keeping it positive. I’ll be back next week!”

God’s Way

Christians want other people to live God’s way.

There are really good reasons for that. Living God’s way honors God, and God deserves that. Living God’s way is the best way to live, and we need that. Living God’s way can encourage others to stay on the right path rather than distract them from it, and they appreciate that.

So what many Christians do is expect other people to behave. And tell other people to behave. And sometimes judge the people who aren’t behaving.

But that just doesn’t make sense. And it doesn’t work.

If people aren’t Christians, it doesn’t make sense to expect them to live by God’s standards. And without having the Holy Spirit to empower them, they’re incapable of living up to God’s standards. Besides, the Bible instructs us not to judge people who are not followers of Jesus.^a

People who are Christians are expected to live by God’s standards, and because they have the Holy Spirit, they are capable of living by them. But too often the way we communicate those expectations is pretty negative. Is fear (of the judgment of others, or even of God himself) really the best motivator for obedience? Think of it this way: What if you asked me if I would ever consider cheating on my wife? And what if my response was, “No way. I mean, I would, but she’d kill me!” That’s not the best answer. Wouldn’t it be better if I said, “No way. I mean, I love her so much, I could never do something like that”?

The best motivation for holiness is love.

It’s also the most effective.

Sandy

Sandy (who I later discovered was a Britney Spears impersonator who sang and danced provocatively in a casino on the Strip) kept coming back to our church, week after week. She never changed her name and never missed a service.

Several months later, I did a message on having purity in your marriage. I spent half the sermon talking to our single people. I explained that they could have purity in their marriages later by having purity before marriage now. So I urged them not to sleep with anyone until they got married.

In the middle of the message, I noticed Sandy sitting in the second row. I thought, She is never coming back after hearing me tell her she can’t have sex until she’s married. She’s going to say we’re another one of those negative churches. I wonder if she’s the type to just storm out, or if she’s the type to come up and let me have it, then storm out.

After the service, Sandy immediately walked toward me. I thought, She’s the type to let me have it and then storm out.

I greeted her, “Hey, Sandy?” (I wasn’t sure if she was still going with Sandy.)

“Vince,” she said, “I’m getting baptized!”

“Huh?” was all I could get out.

“Yes!” she nearly shouted. “Since coming here my life has completely changed. If I explained it to you, I would start crying.” She started crying. “The way I think about everything has changed. The way I think about God, about myself, about life. So I am giving my life to God, and I am getting baptized!”

Sandy got baptized and soon began to change everything about her life—without anyone telling her to. She broke up with her boyfriend. She quit her job.

Later, someone asked how it all happened. She said, “I heard Vince say, ‘God has so much love for you.’ And I just remember thinking, ‘I never knew that. And I felt it for the first time, and it just opened up a whole new life for me.’”

God’s Kindness

What happened with Sandy? Why did she make all those changes without anyone demanding that she behave, without anyone judging her or making her feel guilty?

What happened is exactly what the Bible says will happen.

The grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age.^b

We’re told the grace of God has appeared. Not the truth of God, not the wrath of God, but the grace of God. That grace offers us salvation. Every Christian would agree with that. Then the Bible says that grace teaches us “to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives.”

So according to the Bible, what leads people to stop sinning and to live holy lives? God’s grace. His unmerited love.

So when you, a mere human being, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God’s judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?^c

We’re taught that, as sinners, we can’t judge others. And that it’s God’s kindness that leads people to repentance.

So if we want to lead people to Jesus, our best approach is to lead with love. I don’t think anyone has ever been judged into a relationship with God. Go out and love people. God’s kindness will lead them to repentance.

You

And, by the way, this applies to you as well.

Maybe you truly want to live a holy life for God, but you’ve got this obstacle called sin. Sin has been keeping you from living faithfully for God.

What do you do?

You can focus on feeling judged and guilty. Chances are it won’t be effective. If somehow it were, you might get to a place where you think, I have to stop sinning. I mean, I want to keep doing it, but God might kill me! But that is not the best motivator for obedience.

Instead, what if you focus on God’s grace? Chances are it will be much more effective and get you to a place where you realize, I stopped sinning. I mean, I just love God so much, I couldn’t keep doing it.

Focus on God’s love. His grace will lead you to say no to ungodliness, and his kindness will lead you to repentance.

Now What?

• Read Titus 2:11-12 and Romans 2:3-4.
• Many Bible translations use the word repentance in Romans 2:4. To repent means to turn around. Where does your life need a turnaround? Where do you need to change? How can you picture God’s grace and kindness leading you to make that change? And how can you show God’s love to others?
• Ask God to show you two people he has put in your life who are living their lives without him. Ask him to show you specific ways you can show his kindness to these two people.