Home

A man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

—Genesis 2:24

One of the things I said to Aaron in our wedding vows was, “When I am with you, wherever we are, I am home.” It was a beautiful and romantic thing to say, and I really felt it. Then just a few months after our first anniversary, a friend asked us to think about moving to Grand Rapids, Michigan, three hours away, for Aaron to be a worship leader in his church.

We drove up to Grand Rapids to talk to our friend, and when we got back into the car, I cried most of the way back to Chicago. I could feel the inevitability of it, and I had already begun to mourn.

When I said to him on our wedding day that when I was with him, I was home, I did not mean, “Let’s move to Michigan and see if I’m right, okay?” I meant, “I love you so very much, and let’s stay in Chicago where my parents and my friends are, how about that?” But I said, before God and seven bridesmaids, that Aaron is my home, my partner, my number one, and so I moved to Michigan. I was quite naïve, and promised to live, no matter what, with and for and deeply connected to this other person. Thank God.