Supporting Marriages

Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God.

—John 3:20–21

I’m so deeply thankful to be standing with Aaron in a spot of light and love and richness in our marriage these days. One of the things that has helped yield this loveliness is talking about our marriage with close friends, together and separately. When Annette and I catch up on the phone, she always asks me about my marriage, and I always ask about hers. I stood in their wedding and she stood in ours, and I’m so thankful to be a part of a community that takes that ongoing role seriously. Annette didn’t just support me on the day of our wedding—she continues to support our marriage all these years later, and I’m honored to do that for her, too. Our small group and the Cooking Club girls and a few other friends are always ready to listen and help when we get stuck, and their voices of encouragement and honesty are such gifts. Secret-keeping takes its own toll, so even when things are hard, we tell the truth to our community.