The Older-sister, Tinkerbell Voice

The teaching of the wise is a fountain of life.

—Proverbs 13:14

My friend Kirsten is two years older than I am, but when we met she seemed impossibly older, in a good way, like an exotic, world-wise older sister with whom I would never catch up. She’s the Technicolor version of me: blonder, louder, curvier, more creative, more fearless, more expressive. She’s me, and then some. She’s the me I would be if I could.

Even now, separated by a decade, marriages, babies, two thousand miles, she’s the older-sister, Tinkerbell voice in my head. I find myself asking fairly often what Kirsten would do in a particular situation, because when I think about things the way she thinks about them, whatever I’m facing becomes a whole lot clearer. She has a particular resolve, a sense of self and groundedness that I don’t always have. She’s better at making the choices that work for her, regardless of how common or uncommon they are.

So many times in the years we’ve known each other, Kirsten has shown me what it means to make a life, to craft a way of living and being that works and makes life workable and sweet, and for every time, I’m thankful.