Far-flung Friends

Far-Flung Friends

“You must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind.” And, “Love your neighbor as yourself.”

It was the one last hurrah that did me in: a farewell potluck dinner on the backyard patio to wish Carmen safe travels before she returned home to China. We’d had two years, four road trips, and countless meals together. I had promised myself I wouldn’t cry, but when it came time to say goodbye, I suddenly burst into tears.

There is no dumb question between Carmen and me, and we speak without fear of unintentionally offending. We’ve explored hard topics as well as the mundane and have laughed until our sides hurt, sat in comfortable silence, and quietly shared hard parts of our stories, our family’s stories, our country’s stories. I have glimpsed pieces of Chinese life and culture unreported by any news media and unavailable to most of my fellow citizens. As women of roughly the same age, we have a deep respect for each other that transcends the politics of countries and policies of leaders, and her greatest gift to me has been her friendship.

I’ve learned to separate people from their countries—especially when it comes to foreign policy. My Chinese friends are not China any more than I am the United States. We miss out on the opportunity of deep and abiding friendships when we paint millions of people with the foreign policy decisions of their country’s government. When Jesus commanded us to love our neighbors, he defined “neighbor” by telling the parable of the Good Samaritan. Remember, it was the Samaritan—the despised enemy of the Jewish people—who was the hero, the man who stopped for the stranger lying on the side of the road, knowing full well that had roles been reversed, the favor likely would not have been returned.

Loving my neighbor is not constrained by national boundaries. I count myself immeasurably blessed to have done life alongside Carmen for two years and am already making plans to visit her in Changchun someday.

— Julie

— Today’s Act of Friendship —

Invite someone from another country to your house for dinner. Local universities often have foreign students hoping to experience a dinner with an American family, so that is a great place to start.