Leading By Example

Leading by Example

You yourself must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind. Let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching.

I want my daughter to have good friends, and that means that I must set a good example and show her what friendship looks like among women. I cannot teach her something that I am not practicing as well. Over the years I’ve had a few groups of good friends, and I am quick to let Jasmine know the inner workings of our friendships. I’ll explain to her about the time one of my good friends and I had a disagreement and how we resolved it while remaining friends or how I’ve cheered on another friend as she pursued her dreams. In terms she can understand, I share with her how misunderstandings are handled, tell her about times I’ve been vulnerable and asked for help, how I’ve come to the aid of others, and how we support and cheer for one another. Jasmine asks a lot of questions, and I answer them as honestly as I can. I want her to know that grown-up friendships aren’t perfect, but they are worth it.

This isn’t a conversation that is ever really complete; it is an ongoing process of her watching how I interact with other women. I want her to see friendships based on a solid foundation—things like believing the best of one another, giving the benefit of the doubt, practicing good communication, seeing one another’s strengths, being loyal, holding one another’s confidences, not backbiting or gossiping—just to name a few. I believe that as we do this, she will grow up in the confidence of having good friends, and in fact, she already is. I see her celebrate her friends’ successes, listen as they cry, and offer encouragement when they are low. She is beginning to take on these traits herself, and it starts with watching me and my friends.

You do not have to be a parent to lead by example. Whether we realize it or not, we all have people around us who are watching the way we interact with others. You never know the positive impact your example could have on a younger woman. What kind of example do you want to set for those who may be watching you?

— Kendra

— Today’s Act of Friendship —

Intentionally take the time to encourage a younger person by sharing with them the successes and failures you’ve experienced in friendship.