What Gossip Reveals

What Gossip Reveals

Your kindness will reward you, but your cruelty will destroy you.

“Wow, could she wear a little more makeup?” the coworker asked sarcastically, shooting a pointed glance over to a beautiful blonde woman in a cocktail gown across the room. “That stuff is caked on.”

I attempted a semblance of a smile, uncomfortable in my attempt at politeness, but inside I cringed. The work colleague was often humorous, but sometimes what he meant to be funny came out as a thinly veiled criticism that felt a little vicious. We chatted for a few more minutes, then my husband and I escaped.

As we turned away, I murmured to Tim, “I wonder what he’s saying about us.”

The truth is, the people who gossip to us are the same people who gossip about us. Proverbs warns us that how we choose to treat others doesn’t just have an effect on them, it impacts us as well. Gossip has a detrimental effect on our relationships and can potentially destroy friendships, while kind words build community and encourage all who hear them.

I’d be lying if I said I never listened to or spoke gossip. As humans, there’s a part of us that loves drama, especially if it’s someone else’s drama. It’s the reason people gawk at the aftermath of a tornado or can’t help but slow down to stare at the car accident in the adjacent lane. It’s the same reason that Tim and I watch shows like The Bachelor or I catch myself scanning tabloid headlines in the grocery store checkout. But while speculating on the lives of strangers can feel harmless, the lure of gossip can weave an insidious web around our hearts. If we choose to indulge in it, it will eventually erode our current friendships and dissuade others from becoming our friends.

In the case of the work colleague, his penchant for unkind gossip signaled to me that he couldn’t be trusted—not as a friend and certainly not as a confidant. We must avoid gossip at all costs in order to cultivate fruitful and enriching friendships.

— Kristin

— Today’s Act of Friendship —

Resolve not to speak gossip about anyone else, whether that person is a friend or a potential friend. If a friend starts gossiping to you, stop them in their tracks.