Grateful For Grief

Now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope.

Every year, I relive the day I turned twenty-two. It was a beautiful Friday in October, but I was upset because my boyfriend hadn’t planned anything to celebrate my birthday. The next day, we were in the middle of breaking up when I got a call from my family.

They said that my sister Katrina, who had been in the hospital all week, had taken a turn for the worse. She’d fought breast cancer for five years, but this time was different. This time would be the last.

When I picked up that call, I didn’t know she’d be gone by Sunday.

Every year, I replay those moments—the birthday, the call, the grief. I miss that twenty-two-year-old’s naivete and her belief that bad things couldn’t happen to good people, that healing was on the way. It was—just not in the way I expected.

I take great comfort in knowing there’s more to the story. I heard a message once about how joy and grief are often intertwined and how grief reminds us that the person we mourn matters to us. Our humanity is felt in its fullest measure when we love—and when we experience loss. Grief is love.

And so, each year when my birthday arrives, I remember. Fall is my favorite season and always has been, but it’s the perfect reminder to me now that death and rebirth go hand in hand. Though the seasons we experience are always temporary, I’m thankful that the arc of our life is not. Scripture assures us that as people of faith, we do not grieve like people with no hope—because we know our present reality is not the end. An eternity with Jesus is the epilogue to the story, and it’s still being written.

Even though I miss my sister, I don’t want to say I’ve “lost” her. The truth is that when someone is in your heart, they’re never truly gone. Her legacies of love and joy are still with me, tempering this temporary absence. Love doesn’t end with death. Our grief is but an extension of our deep love. And so we wait—and hope.

Kristin

Today’s Act of Gratitude

Think of someone you’ve grieved, remembering how you loved that person and thanking God for the hope of eternity together.