Give Them Grace

Fathers, do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged.

Colossians 3:21

CURT’S WIFE, MANDY, closed the door quietly as she left his office. Curt wasn’t sure how he felt about what she had just shared with him. Mandy believed that he had been too harsh lately with their twin thirteen-year-old boys, and she had taken the opportunity to share her concerns.

But I’m their father, and it is my responsibility to make sure they do things the right way, Curt thought to himself. But he also had to admit that his boys had seemed discouraged lately, as if they didn’t feel they could ever meet his standards.

The Greek word for aggravate in Colossians 3:21 can also mean to stir up, provoke, or irritate. So another way to phrase the apostle Paul’s command is “stop nagging your kids.”

As fathers, it is our responsibility (along with our wives) to provide rules and guidelines for our children, but these rules should never become a noose that strangles them. Our rules should provide a safe environment where our kids are free to discover themselves and their unique role in the story God is writing. Our rules should never suffocate our children and cause them to lose heart. When our children feel that nothing they do is good enough, it is natural for them to be discouraged and simply give up. It can happen in our relationship with God, too, if we see Him as impossible to please.

In what ways are your rules exasperating your children? How can you show them grace instead?

BOTTOM LINE

A father’s words have a great impact. Make sure your instruction builds up your children instead of causing them to become discouraged and lose heart.

Moment of Strength: Ephesians 6:4