Question 1

Why should I beware of flattery—it doesn’t hurt anyone, does it?

Accepted Answer

2 Samuel 17:11“And I advise that you personally lead the troops.”Absalom allowed himself to be flattered into leading his army into a battle that would be extremely difficult to win. We should beware of flattery because it can trick us into doing something we are unprepared to do.Proverbs 29:5To flatter friends is to lay a trap for their feet.We should beware of flattery because it is often manipulation intended to make us vulnerable to the flatterer. Flattery often weaponizes selfish ambition or any number of other unhealthy motives. Ultimately, flattery will only undermine our relationships.Proverbs 7:21-23She seduced him with her pretty speech and enticed him with her flattery. He followed her at once, like an ox going to the slaughter. He was like a stag caught in a trap, awaiting the arrow that would pierce its heart. He was like a bird flying into a snare, little knowing it would cost him his life.We should beware of flattery because, in its most dishonest and deceptive form, it is a lie that leads us into sin. Flattery intended to lead us into sexual compromise is especially intoxicating and powerful.

Question 2

How can I be less vulnerable to flattery?

Accepted Answer

Luke 20:21, 23“Teacher,” they said, “we know that you speak and teach what is right and are not influenced by what others think. You teach the way of God truthfully.” . . . He saw through their trickery.Jesus was careful to weigh the motives of those who sought to destroy his ministry through flattery. A compliment sometimes can be flattery in disguise. We should consider why a person, especially someone we do not know well, is complimenting us. It will help prepare us for the next words that come out of the person’s mouth.1 Thessalonians 2:4-5We speak as messengers approved by God to be entrusted with the Good News. Our purpose is to please God, not people. He alone examines the motives of our hearts. Never once did we try to win you with flattery, as you well know.Paul refused to use flattery as a manipulative tool to spread the gospel. This made him more credible as a witness and also less vulnerable to flattery himself.