Why Not Make Happiness A Habit?

Why not make happiness a habit?

In everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

You more likely act yourself into feeling than feel yourself into action. JEROME BRUNER

THE DAILY EXPERIENCE OF happiness requires our sustained effort. When Nanci and I bought our house nearly forty years ago, it didn’t become ours in any meaningful sense until we took possession. Likewise, our happiness was bought and paid for by Christ. But until we actually take hold of it, it’s not really ours. To find happiness we must move into it.

Scripture repeatedly shows that when we come to Christ, we are no longer in bondage to sin (see Romans 6:18). Yes, we still can and do sin, but in any given moment we don’t have to—we have a new nature in Christ and the enablement of the Spirit (see 2 Corinthians 5:17). However, God doesn’t force us to obey him; he gives us a choice.

Consider Philippians 2:12-13: “Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling [our actions], for it is God who works in you [God’s actions], both to will and to work for his good pleasure [God’s actions].” We don’t have to choose between God’s sovereignty and human will; this passage teaches participation by both parties. This partnership occurs when two beings genuinely work together, without any implication of equality in intellect, authority, or resolve. (Naturally, any partnership between the infinite Creator God and finite, fallen human beings is decidedly unequal!)

We can’t make ourselves happy in God any more than a seed can make itself grow. But we’re not just seeds. We’re greenhouse farmers who can make sure the seed is planted, watered, and fertilized.

Paul said to the church in Corinth, “I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth” (1 Corinthians 3:6). While God makes the crop grow, the people who raise the largest and best produce, winning ribbons at the county fair, do their part too.

It’s not always easy to choose what brings ultimate, lasting happiness over what brings instant, temporary happiness. Choosing happiness is not merely working harder to pull up our minds and moods, as we would our bootstraps. Rather, it’s gratefully receiving God’s grace and happiness.

Still, there’s a lot to be said for “Just do it.” Too many of us wait for sufficient motivation before making wise and joy-producing choices. But whether it’s exercise, eating right, or volunteering to serve others, when we take those first steps, we overcome inertia and establish new habits. Once we see the positive happiness that results, we’re much more motivated to keep up those new patterns.

When a physical action is repeated over time, long-term muscle memory is formed. Climbing, typing, and playing musical instruments all utilize muscle memory. This is similar to how happiness works: the brain has its own muscle memory. We choose to follow Christ by taking a certain action, we find happiness in it, and then we do it again because of the payoff we receive. When we turn off the television and read a good book, we feel better—more engaged and enriched. Recalling that, we do the same thing again, and eventually it becomes a habit. We end up reading not just because we think we should but because we want to.

Both happiness and unhappiness are states of mind that self-perpetuate. The more delighted we are, the more delight becomes our default. The angrier we are, the more anger becomes our default.

Paul said, “Fix your thoughts on what is true. . . . Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise” (Philippians 4:8, NLT). This doesn’t happen automatically. But once we develop the habit and experience its rewards, we instinctively turn our minds to what makes us happy in Christ.

Everyone who has dieted knows that nearly any diet works when habitually followed, but no diet works when repeatedly violated. It’s not the inherent virtue of a diet or exercise plan but the daily choices related to diet or exercise that determine results.

Some believers become obsessed with everything that’s wrong with the world. We’re continually bombarded by “news” (which is sometimes more sensational than informative) that dwells on the sufferings and tragedies of life. It’s easy for the unceasing avalanche of bad news to bury the Good News. I don’t favor living in a cave, blissfully ignorant of the world’s woes. But we are to focus our thoughts on true eternal realities by remembering God’s presence, praying, and feeding our minds with good things that honor our King.

When I’m snorkeling for hours on end, taking underwater photos, I don’t think about being cold, hungry, or tired—not because I’m in denial, but because I’m so focused on the magnificent and praiseworthy creativity of my God, who made the ocean’s wonders.

When I was a young boy, I collected rocks. There were lots of plain stones, as well as muddy ones, with worms and bugs all around and under them. But this didn’t deter me, because I wasn’t collecting worms or bugs; I was collecting beautiful stones. Even when they didn’t appear beautiful, I saw their hidden beauty.

As I collected rocks, and as others collect coins and stamps, we can collect reasons to praise God. We can develop an eye for beauty in God, his world, and the people and man-made objects in it. That’s not denying the Curse; it’s cultivating the happiness of a God-centered worldview.

Even in a fallen world, God invites us to happiness in him. Why would we say no, when all it takes to say yes is making small decisions that produce large results?

Dear Jesus, please remind us to be active, not passive, when it comes to seeking Christ-honoring happiness. Help us develop new disciplines that will unlock more of your happiness in our lives. May we fix our minds on what’s pleasing to you—things that are honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and worthy of praise. Always and above all, move us to fix our minds on you, the endlessly deep well of all that is good and delightful.