When There’s A Hole In Your Soul - Guilt And The Hole In Your Soul

When There’s a Hole in Your Soul - Guilt and the Hole in Your Soul

I WONDER if you relate to any of these:

You drop your three-year-old off at day care on your way to work. Your work is important to you and your family needs your income, but guilt eats a hole in your soul.

Your husband wants you to be available for him emotionally and physically but you have nothing to spare. You know you’re not holding up your end of the relationship, and guilt eats a hole in your soul.

You know your mom needs you to help her more because your dad’s health is declining fast. But you’re stretched so thin you want to cry; guilt eats a hole in your soul.

Your teenager takes a nosedive and is making every wrong decision in the book. You blame yourself, and guilt eats a hole in your soul.

You tell your boss you have to leave early to pick up your son from day care. The project is due tomorrow, and guilt eats a hole in your soul.

Your eighteen-month-old is precious—but you can’t stand another minute of his clinging! You need a breather, and when you finally get it, guilt eats a hole in your soul.

Your “organization” is calling for volunteers, but you don’t raise your hand. You know they need you to contribute; guilt eats a hole in your soul.

Your brother wants to borrow money. You say no, or you say yes. Either way, guilt eats a hole in your soul.

You’re lucky—you get to stay home with the kids—but you’re miserable. Other moms would kill for this opportunity, and guilt eats a hole in your soul.

You’re supposed to love him. Guilt eats a hole in your soul.

Guilt is a tricky topic. On the one hand, guilt is a valuable tool used by the Holy Spirit to help develop our characters. It pulls us out of our self-centeredness. It ensures that our moral compass is always pointing due north. Thus, the dictionary’s definition of guilt—remorseful awareness of having done something wrong^a—is critical to the shaping of our person and our society.

However, the guilt I’m writing about is more in line with the dictionary’s other definition of guilt—self-reproach for supposed inadequacy or wrongdoing.^b Girlfriends, sometimes things are not good or bad. They just are . . . at least for today.

I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid. (John 14:27)

Your self-reproach for your supposed inadequacy is eating a hole in your soul. Tell the voice of guilt to be quiet—you’re doing the very best you can. Sssshhh.

^a American Heritage Dictionary, 4th ed., s.v. “guilt.”

^b Ibid.